Brick could have done a better job

This isn't going to be anything new or some great revelation. But seriously, what the fuck is wrong with weather men? They honestly have to have the most useless job on the planet simply because they can't do their job correctly. Ok, a little background before the rant. We've been trying to go camping for the past two weeks and each time the following scene transpires:

M: "Looks like they’re calling for scattered thunderstorms tonight and then 60% chance of rain showers on Saturday. You feel like chancing it?"
Me: "Yeah, I saw that too. I would but those thunderstorms don't look to fun."
M: "I guess we should put this thing off till next week."
Me: "Might as well, hopefully it'll be better weather."

Sorry for my paraphrase of 6 conversations, occurring over the course of 2 weeks. Probably doesn't work, but you get the point. Anyway, problem is, last weekend was the nicest fucking weekend of the year. No rain. No thunder. No lightning. Hell, barely even a cloud till Sunday. So I say, what the fuck weather man? Where were you on that one? You fucking cock gobbling assholes! (It’s surprising to me how well those last two insults work together, I’m making a note). Disclaimer: Do I expect them to be perfect in their given occupation? No. I fuck up all the time at work. I try to do my best but sometimes things just get f-ed and that's just what happens. I'm willing to cut them some slack. I'm sure reading and interpreting between a thousand different computer generated models on a daily basis can be difficult and stressful and tedious. I'll give you a free pass on the occasional screw-up. The problem arises when you, asshat, decide to turn the occasional screw-up into the everyday fuck-up and it fucks up my life. Honestly, how many picnics have you ruined; day trips to six flags have you cancelled; commutes have you turned to gridlock? How many children have you made cry at you idiotic hand? If we are doing anything outside, we’re at your mercy. It’s like giving a kid with downs syndrome an atomic bomb to play with. Misappropriation of power. You should quit your job and become the cock jockey that you always were.

Don't think that you dot coms are getting away without a comment! You are the worst of all. Now get back here and let me kick you in the motherboard. I know there is a man hiding somewhere behind that binary façade. A man who is either too stupid or too ugly to be put on TV. And probably both. Really, the only thing I can purport to be first hand fact about the man in the computer is this: he is an asshole.

One final thought. Marty, shut the fuck up and just give us an inaccurate weather report. You're a weather man, not an anchor man! No one wants to here you're moronic banter or watch you surf the internet like a douche-bag on live TV. Next time you do the polar bear plunge, maybe you just keep your head under the water and never come back up.